Monday, October 29, 2007

Just one more reason to hate Hollywood

Hollywood now proposes that in a new live-action movie based on the G.I. Joe toy line, Joe's -- well, "G.I." -- identity needs to be replaced by membership in an "international force based in Brussels." The IGN Entertainment news site reports Paramount is considering replacing our "real American hero" with "Action Man," member of an "international operations team."

Paramount will simply turn Joe's name into an acronym.

The show biz newspaper Variety reports: "G.I. Joe is now a Brussels-based outfit that stands for Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, an international co-ed force of operatives who use hi-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer."

Well, thank goodness the villain -- no need to offend anyone by making our villains Arabs, Muslims, or foreign dictators of any stripe these days, though apparently Presbyterians who talk like Scottie on "Star Trek" are still OK -- is a double-crossing arms dealer. Otherwise one might be tempted to conclude the geniuses at Paramount believe arms dealing itself is evil.

4 comments:

Michael Grant Clark said...

What? Cobra are coming after me?

Thanks' for the intel Allen, the next shipment is in the post disguised as missiles.

Unknown said...

Michael, you vere a fool to post comments online it allowed us to track you, ve have found you and ve vant to kill you outright, but Hollyvood says that isn't PC, so ve vill just tickle you till you pee your pants.

Michael Grant Clark said...

noooooooo! I've been founded.

Better activate the self destruct all us villains have in the house. Rather dangerous as I keep mistaking it for the tv remote.

Unknown said...

LOL!! I keep mistaking mine for the toilet!